I’m writing this really really quietly, sitting up in bed at dawn, trying not to scratch my nib too loudly because I don’t want to wake up the horrible Merrys. They’re still being disgusting to me, but I think the more they see me with Katherine, the more their attitude might change.
So let me tell you about my cousin Katherine. She is the MOST AMAZING PERSON I HAVE EVER MET! Anyway, what happened was... the Merrys had made me feel like a complete bumpkin and freak in my thick-soled brown shoes and my vile burgundy dress and filled me with panic about how on earth I was going to manage in front of the queen.
I was also starving, as I didn’t know where to go for breakfast and they all seemed to have brought food down from the banquet last night and were bringing out all these delicious rolls and marchpane hearts and chicken wings from under their beds. And I was absolutely dying to pee and I certainly wasn’t going to use the chamber pot in front of them and anyway it was overflowing with sick. Oh no, I need to stop now... this old woman – she’s about thirty - I call her The Hawk - who’s in charge of all we junior maids-in-waiting, is coming down the corridor and we have to clear up our room. More later, my secret friends. xxxMatilda
Written by David Cain - September 02 2013